Remembrance
by BeWhoYouAre99
Summary: Commander Nathaniel Taylor remembers everything and feels the pain of losing his son to the other side. He misses Lucas and hopes that one day, his boy come back to him.


**A/N: It's hard to lose a loved one. No matter how they've been taken away from you, it still hurts and sometimes the pain never goes away. It always stays there to haunt you.**

**This story is entirely in Commander Taylor's Point of View about his feelings about his son, Lucas.**

**So here you go, enjoy reading!**

I remember. I remember my little boy every single day. I think of him whenever I see Jim Shannon with his teenaged kid Josh. I was present to witness Shannon's look of panic when his oldest had gone missing outside the gates. It echoed my own when my son disappeared from the gates of Terra Nova.

At that moment, I consoled the other father with words, telling him that everything would be alright in the end and Josh would return home safe and alive. I knew that there was a hundred percent possibility for my words to be false but I still hoped for Jim's sake that Josh and his foolish friends, led by Skye would return. I did not want him to endure the same sense of agony when I lost my own.

I rarely ever talk about it but yes, I am a father and I have a son. I remember him and miss my only child. I miss Lucas.

Lucas turned out to be fighting for the exact opposite of my morals, values, hopes and dreams. He is my flesh and blood and that is what reminds me of my failure. Thinking of Lucas is a constant reminder of how I had never been the best father I could have been. I remember my son's first word, which happened to be 'Da Da'. The day he said those words sent a thrill across me and I lifted my boy up in the air and embraced him tightly. He laughed happily while Ayani smiled at me from the corner of the room.

Ayani was a good mother. In fact she was the best mother she ever could have been. She showered Lucas with love and always believed in him. She was a perfect wife, who stood by me no matter how difficult things seemed to be. I miss her daily and wonder what she would have thought of her son and husband fighting against each other in battle. Perhaps Lucas would not have turned away from me if she was still there to guide him and take care of him.

I remember the day my son started to walk. I remember the day he graduated from school. I remember the innocence that covered Lucas's bright face as he sat on his desk, pondering over books and filling his brain with as much information as he possibly could.

I knew that Lucas had always been destined to do great things. He had been an intelligent young being since the beginning. It might be considered wishful thinking but I hope that one day the boy will realise his mistakes and come back to me. Together, we will fight to preserve and protect all things good and pure. We would make an invincible team; a father and son fighting side by side to make the world a better place. It should not have come to this that the father would be fighting for good and the son for evil. I never imagined we would be on different sides, fighting dutifully for different causes.

I never forget my son. He is always a part of me and I try my best to honour our past memories. Deep down inside Lucas also knows that I do not hunt him down, as I would do to any other man or woman, not because Ayani would have been heart broken because of it. But because he is still my son and will always be.

I remember when I asked Mira how Lucas was when I encountered her outside the gates, she took pity at my question and answered positively. He was in good health, she said. And that was all I needed to hear.

In my eyes, he is still the boy he used to be. He is one of the reasons why I came here to Terra Nova, to provide him 'a fresh start', as said by Elisabeth Shannon for her children. Lucas came on the second pilgrimage and I was full of relief. I knew that there would be many problems to face but that was fine with me as long as I had the last member of my family alongside me. But alas, things did not turn out to be the way I want them to be. Still, I do not lose hope. Maybe one day my boy will return back to me.

**A/N: I was thinking about the Commander's relationship with Lucas and I came to the conclusion that it must have been a terrible punch in the stomach for him to lose his son to the 'bad guys' but still, I believe that maybe Lucas will realise his mistakes and return to his father. **

**Well, I can hope for that. I hope you liked reading this and leave a Review.**

**By the way, are you excited for the Season Finale? I wonder which beloved character with out family in Terra Nova will die (A s hinted by the show directors). Who do you think it is? **

**The Terra Nova fan base says that it's either Mark Reynolds who would die to save Maddy, Malcolm Wallace for the sake of Elisabeth, Alicia Washington in order to protect Commander Taylor OR Skye to redeem herself. I like all of these characters but sadly, someone has to die and I'm desperate to find out who it is.**

**I heard that Fox Entertainment has postponed the decision of the renewal of Terra Nova for a second season until January. But hopefully, we'll get our show back! Terra Nova is absolutely amazing and there hasn't been any other show like it, so we'll definitely get another season. **

**So please REVIEW! **


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